Game Of …
Today, is the last day of getting ready for school with my seven year-old and after this morning, I think I’m glad. Like many parents, I am willing to “take one for the team,” if it means encouraging my son’s curiosity, but sometimes I just feel gullible and off my game.
In the bathroom, while I was applying my mascara, mouth stretched to an “O” position and my eyes wide open, Azul said to me, “I’m getting better at karate.”
A nasally “uh, huh,” was all I was able to get out as a response. A standard parental reply when we’re busy and (although many won’t admit it) we just don’t care.
Now, Azul is not registered in karate and I was not aware of any interest, practicing or attempt to improve. I moved on to my lipstick application, oddly moving my mouth to the same place it was before.
“Wanna see?” He kept on.
As soon as the words escaped my mouth, everything turned to slow-motion, “Suuuurrre.” I said, turning toward him.
“Hiii-yaaa!” And I got a karate chop to the arm.
“Ouch! Why did you do that?”
“See, told you I’m getting better.”
With a shrug, he turned and walked away. leaving his opened mouth sensei behind.
So off my game!
The Birds And The Bees
Spring is in the air. The temperature is rising, the birds are singing and the bees are …
“A bee is dying! A bee is dying!” My seven year-old ran in the house in a state of panic. Confused I asked if he could show me what he was talking about. I followed him back outside where we saw this: (Cue porn music now.)
If the bees are a buzzing don’t come a knocking! Well, we knocked or really we pulled out the camera and recorded them, which of course interrupted their special moment. And sorry for the scream.
I explained they were not bees, but actually wasps. That really scared Azul. Then that there were two of them and they weren’t dying but mating. That news terrified him.
Once he removed his hand from his mouth, which had covered it as if he had said something wrong, still wide-eyed, he finally mustered up a reply.
“That’s the most discussing thing I’ve ever seen!”
Ah, Spring.
Do You See What I See?
“Have you ever had a Peeping Tom?” was the question asked by my curious and concerned seven year-old. A question I was prepared to answer, considering our recent conversations.
Okay, now, I’ll answer the question, “Why were Peeping Toms in your recent conversations?”
There are two, the first being Diary of a Wimpy Kid, a series which Azul has independently read through in the course of a couple of weeks, and the simultaneous playing of those movies in my house. Second, we also just watched the 80s’ classic Back to the Future, where Azul was relieved the “old” movie was in color. Both stories include peeping in the storyline. I know, kids’ movies these days!
After a thorough investigation (I Googled it.) into the origin of the term “Peeping Tom” and the following discussion of Lady Godiva, riding horses naked and the loss of sight or death due to seeing someone in the nude, I reassured him, “Toms” were not looking through our windows. That is when the original question surfaced.
“Have you ever had a Peeping Tom?”
With a shrug and lack of worry, I answered, “Not that I know of.”
“Well, there are some pretty desperate men out there, that will go for anything!”
After the laughter subsided, stripped of all my self-esteem, I replied, “I’ll keep my eye out for them.”
Carmelina Hart 